Authenticity is the key driver of modern-day social change.
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We all make mistakes. We all say things publicly that are rightly unacceptable in the present day social environment. Marginalized populations are increasingly more confident and vocal about how they want to be addressed and treated in public. The #metoo movement amongst women has laid clear boundaries on the way men interact with women…rightly so. The #blacklivesmatter movement has laid clear boundaries on the way law enforcement interacts with people of African ancestry…rightly so. The 2LGBTQ+ movement has demanded that identities and pronouns be honoured by those outside of their community…rightly so. The indigenous nations worldwide are demanding treaty rights, first nation status and reconciliation for the colonial history they have endured…rightly so.
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So how do we navigate this modern-day social milieu where the ways we used to talk, text, chat and act are being challenged as racist, sexist, homophobic or privileged? Simple. With humility, empathy and authenticity. As a more inclusive way of communicating develops, we all have to be ‘comfortable with being uncomfortable’. In other words, unlike the social confidence certain demographics felt in the ’50s, ‘60s and ‘70s…you cannot speak to people any way you like. You cannot treat people any way you like. You do not know everything! So the most logical way to interact socially is with the understanding that you are going to say and do things that initially offend groups who have gained social power. No problem. Accept the immediate or reflective criticism/correction and own it. Then authentically apologize and honour the viewpoint of those you have disturbed. Trust me…they will appreciate your authenticity.
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There is a definite privileged mindset that expects to be comfortable all of the time. Geesh. Think about it. Many of the historically marginalized communities in society have been uncomfortable on a daily basis for decades! If you do any form of authentic research into civil rights, indigenous rights, women's rights, queer/trans rights, disabilities rights, mental health rights, etc. — you will experience continuous stories of trauma, discrimination, racism, violence, exclusion and…discomfort. So in the present day, there is a karmic energy in society where able-bodied, heterosexual, anglophone, affluent, male, settler people have to accept some discomfort as the social playing-field gets balanced. We have to authentically ‘think twice’ about the public ways we communicate in-person and online. This is NOT a loss of power for the groups I just mentioned. Not at all. It is a global phenomenon where every citizen (civil rights) is gaining the personal confidence to demand and expect fair treatment on a daily basis. This process may be awkward and uncomfortable for some, but it is inclusive and necessary.
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The Oxford dictionary describes the existential definition of authentic as “relating to or denoting an emotionally appropriate, significant, purposive, and responsible mode of human life”. I am referring to this type of authenticity. It is a functional, positive, relational way of thinking that allows for mistakes, promotes apologies and most importantly respects the 1st voice experience of those who are asking to be treated, addressed and communicated to in a particular way. This is a brand new, developing social construct. One that I personally welcome. I am not perfect by any means…but I am ok with being authentically imperfect. I am willing to interact in new spaces, amongst new faces, with the understanding that I may do or say something that initially upsets someone. I will not be offended by being ‘called out’ and will maintain a perspective of open, authentic humility. That is the key.